My Place

It's the last day of April. I liked April. I'll miss April.
And with that said...HELLO MONTH OF MAY! :D In Spanish class, we're celebratig Cinco de Mayo on May sixth. Go figure.
This means that there are only about seven weeks left of school until summer holiday! My heart is going doki-doki just thinking about it!
I've decided to try my hand at bento box lunch making. I always wanted to make them, but I never found the time or equipment. After thought and research, I found that just using some Tupperware works just as well as buying a bento box. Plus, Tupperware is washable! :D
For me, today was just one of those days where you wake up crabby and end up yelling at everyone (and feeling guilty about it later). As much as I'd love to rant, I'm short on time, so I'll just type up my latest poem.

There is a special place only for me,
hidden from the world, standing in the mist.
My secret hideaway which no soul can see,
Vast and green, its valley spreads out wide,
my hideout's rivers sparkling like liquid sapphire,
there are tall strong trees with birds inside.
My hidden place is private, I can stay there to think,
I run through the white sand carelessly,
From the forest berries I feast and the clean water I drink.
My little piece of heaven shines high,
with a beautiful sun, a motherly moon,
and bright white clouds in an endless summer sky.
I can't remember how I found this land at all,
the lush landscape is always cloaked,
yet I have come to this valley since I was quite small.
I cannot tell nor can I show,
anyone of this miniature Eden,
For if I do, tragic events shall fall as you could never know.
Anyone can come to my hidden place,
they only need believe,
faith must be hard this days, for no other soul hath shown his face.
This land carries a magic spell,
it gives you the power to understand,
but I cannot express what lessons I learned,
in language, words do not always tell.
Should you wish to visit, you need complete a deed,
you must plant goodness in your fellow man,
a great tree of kindness sprouts from one seed.
So as I lay in the grassy flat,
I wonder who else dwelled here,
this paradise may be the spot where wise old Solomon sat.
But this land is mine, for myself alone,
I come here often, I claimed it as my territory,
this vibrant scenery has become my home.
Should you pass through, do not be scared,
this place of beauty can be shared,
you need only be prepared.

Zombies, Bagels, and Moonflowers

What's Playing In My Ear:"Unwell"-Matchbox 20
There is nothing more satisfying than eating chametz after a whole week of matzah. I swear, I have never been so happy to eat a bagel in my life.
I love the fact that everyone who went to prom is essentially brain dead today. The school is full of walking zombies, a couple of my friends included. Makes me feel even better about not going. Next year I plan on going to prom with my friends if there isn't a Jewish holiday in the way.
For English class I had to read "Catch-22" by Joseph Heller. On Friday, I was on page 87 of 463. By Sunday, I had finished the entire thing. That's right. I read 376 pages in a timespan of about two and a half days, which is an accomplishment considering that the book has no plot/storyline or chronological order. Take THAT, organized education!
Mum has the brilliant idea of sending me to spend my summer at an all-girl's Chabad camp in Panama. She wants me to practice my Spanish instead of spending my summer with the family back in Vikingland/Denmark. That is one idea I actually agree with. Mum's going there in a couple of weeks or so, which means we're not obligated to see them for another three years or so. Plus, my uncle canceled his trip to come here with my little cousins, whom I cannot stand. Pretty sweet deal, huh?
Our tulips finally decided to come up, which means Mum will go on another planting spree. She said something about me digging up flower beds. T_T I want to plant some moonflowers because they are just made of awesome: gigantic petals, "magical properties", vine-like behavior, what's not to love?
Meh, not much more to jabber about. I'm off to work on that white collar crime project for Business Law

Matzah Madness

What's Playing In My Ear:"Triple Dreams"-SeraMyu
Funny how time flies by when you're watching people get drunk at the seder...
A lot of funny stuff has happened since I posted: I got stabbed in the arm with a fork (and bled), got my first B+ instead of an A in Spanish, watched the sun rise backwards, accidentally answered my teacher in Swedish, sneezed out lemonade, and got my matzah stolen from me at lunch. Oye peoples...GET YOUR OWN MATZAH, THIS SHEET'S MINE BITCHES! >:o
Ugh, I can't wait for summer...
Well, spending four days straight with my family made me realize how crazy they really are. How many of YOUR relatives tell you that putting a fish skeleton under your pillow is lucky? I can't remember a minute during the entire holiday that my brothers weren't fighting with each other or trying to fight with me. As insane as they might be, they make me look normal, so I love 'em. :D Gotta love the holidays...
Geez, you miss ONE day of school and end up super-behind! I have to catch up on like 30 pages of reading in history, 6 workbook pages in Spanish, a science lab, a math test, a vocabulary test, and my isearch paper. The paper has been driving me crazy, I didn't think ahead when I set my deadlines and now I'm scrambling to finish. >_> I hate school.
The only thing I hate about Passover is the lack of edibles. I usually find stuff to snack on, but this year we've cut on the goodies. T_T It's my parent's secret way of making me diet... DIET IS 'DIE' WITH A 'T' AT THE END! I'M NOT FAT!
...am I?

Sweet Sixteen

What's Playing In My Ear:"Dance, Dance"-Fall Out Boy
Birthdays rock.
Period.
My friend called me at 6-ish in the AM, I got a kung-fu card from my cousin, had awesome birthday balloons, and found out that I don't have a twin.
I love turning sixteen.
Except when you have a test on volcanic activity on the same day that you were too busy to study for. Oh well, to heck with Earth Science.
I decided that for my birthday I would straighten my hair, put in my contacts, and brush on a bit of makeup, but I did not think that people would have trouble recognizing me. I waved to a group of my friends in the hall, and they had no clue who I was. Geez, am I THAT ugly on a daily basis?
After school, Mum and Dad took me for Japanese birthday lunch. Tempura, sushi, udon soup, mochi.... I was in heaven. Mum and I spent the rest of the day at the mall shopping. She wanted me to pick something out for my birthday, but fashion these days is just horrifying. It's as if the fashion designers want you to look like you dressed in the dark. These clothes would make a blind gay man go "Oh, dear CHRIST!" I still had fun with Mum anyways, we don't spend nearly enough time together.
Since my secular birthday was a half day, I brought in treats today for my Judaic birthday. I figured out how to bake cookies without harming anyone in the process, so I brought some of those for everybody. Erin brought me awesome balloons, and I went through the whole day on cloud nine. :D
Turning sixteen is überly-awesome

Fight Song

Always being your same old self is good.
It's also a better thing to not ask, "Why?"
Will you restart from there again?
This is the thing that really suits you the most.

A person is a person, and you are yourself.
If you try and compare to something else, then you will lose.
In ourselves we have the strength to never lose,
So no matter what type of wall it is, we will break through.

Occasionally, it's good to cry.
And it's okay for people to see your weak spot too.
But, don't get stuck there!
You can still do it, go for that dream you had before.

No matter how many words you say,
Only one word can be the best of all.
The first thing to do is step forward for yourself,
"Do your best" Even being that type of cheap guy is okay.

Even now, you might be worried about something,
Because it might be something that has been dented.
But, somewhere in the future with you,
We can laugh in agreement, we can make that path.

No matter how many words you say,
Only one word can be the best of all.
Come out from under that high place and continue up that slope.

Even now, you might be worried about something,
Because it might be something that has been dented.
After finally taking one step, you could start to walk again, couldn't you?
"Do your best" You see, it's really a suitable reason.

For The Love of...Grass?....

What's Playing in My Ear: "Nine In The Afternoon"-Panic at the Disco

You know what is bothering me at the moment? It really annoys the heck out of me, even though it's a completely random and pointless topic. Panic at the Disco got rid of the exclamation point after "Panic." What's up with that? MAKE UP YOUR MIND PEOPLE! IS THERE AN IDENTITY CRISIS WITHIN YOUR RANKS?
Back to my scheduled rant...
This weekend, the snow FINALLY melted completely! I have never in my life been so happy to see grass. It's a lot like the time we were on that ferry in Sweden, and, well....you can imagine the rest.
It was nice to finally open the windows and go outside again! I wanted to go on a bike ride because the weather was so nice, but I ended up getting nabbed for a babysitting job instead. I babysat for a three-year old girl, twin two year-old boys, and a 1 year-old girl ALL AT ONCE. My head is still recovering from the pain. At least they paid well. The things I do for cash...
Everyone's all abuzz about prom here nowadays. I got asked by a couple of guys, but I don't want to go to prom this year. It's not a sophomore dance, and I would feel out of place. Plus, prom ain't cheap; between the dress, the tickets, and the side costs, it's insane. I'll go next year with my friends, that seems like much more fun.
I still have no clue what I'm doing this summer, but going to Denmark isn't an option at this point. As much as I love going back, there are to many issues at the moment that conflict with the idea. There's really nothing left for me there except problems that I cannot solve.
We took a disorders test in psychology today, and apparently I suffer from both narcissism and low self-esteem. How the hell does that work? Even my teacher was baffled....stupid falsified internet test.
Ugh, my feet are both asleep. I forgot how much something as stupid as sleeping limbs can hurt. I'm going to go take advantage of the nice weather and take a walk.

Vacation Smells Like Hamantaschen

What's Playing in My Ear: "Happiness"-Arashi
VACATION RULES. PERIOD.
I get to sleep in, stay up late, bake whenever I want, and write to my heart's desire....right?
WRONG.
I get to clean and organize the pantry, write my i-Search, clean my room, fix the dressers, and put up with dear old mum and dad for a whole week straight.
Fabulous.
Well, at least Purim was awesome. Jonas Brothers costumes were the best ones I've ever made yet. One of my more brilliant ideas, if I do say so myself. (Except for the part where every pre-teen and, even teenage, girl in the shul commenced to chase us down for pictures.) Not one of my more brilliant ideas.
Well, it was fun nonetheless, my brother was home, I spent some time with the community, I made fun of my least favorite boy band, hung out with old friends, and I got to eat triangular pastries filled with jam.
What could be better?
Mum's agreed to give another try at teaching me to cook over vacation, so I'm a little excited about that prospect. Although, most of my cooking attempts were not as successful as I'd hoped. We had the onigiri incident, the snow peas accident, and nobody could forget the ginger snaps FROM HELL.
Let's hope I've lost my accident-prone streak in the kitchen.
Needless to say, all this craziness leaves little room for getting anything done that I honestly want to accomplish, but I can't expect too much from myself. All I really want is a bit of R & R, a chance to recharge from all the insanity that's been happening to me lately.
I just can't take any more freaking snow. I'm going insane. I need some natural scenery. One of these days I'm going to take a blowtorch to all the white stuff and just melt all of it.
I'm not kidding. A blowtorch.

People Are Getting Drunk At 6 AM Today?

What's playing in my ear:"Knockin' Down Hesitation"-Anza Ōyama

.....Let's just say, I'm glad I'm Jewish. Our holidays are kind of nutty, but this is insane.
[Which reminds me, I need to get cracking on that Purim costume. My friends and I are going as the Jonas Brothers. Heh heh.... (Please, if you know what's good for you, don't ask.)]
I DID wear green today (my jade ring) because I didn't feel like fending off pokes and pinches and whatnot.
Let's see... Today I learned that I can't draw, that Lisa will punch you if you sing the 'Circle Circle Dot Dot' song, and that some things are best left unsaid.
I met this kid who's mum works with a publishing company who would be interested in looking at my book! Now I actually have a chance of getting my work out there. 'Bout time, if you ask me. The other day, a friend of mine got considerably upset because I didn't show my book to her. Look people, this stuff doesn't have a copyright quite yet, and I can't risk anyone stealing my hard-thought ideas. Sorry if I offend you, but I can't be too careful.
Funny thing, at the beginning of the school year, almost all my friends were dating someone except me. Now, they've all broken up with their boyfriends. That means that I'm going out with someone within the next month or two! (It's the way our whole mystical cycle works with the fates and destiny and all that jazz. Unless you sat at my lunch table last year, you won't get it, so don't ask.) But if not, I'm perfectly okay being single. There's no immediate need for a boyfriend at the moment.
I have a piano recital in a month or so, but I HATE recitals. My teacher knows that I don't enjoy recitals, but she always puts me in them anyway. I don't preform well in front of crowds when it comes to piano. But I'm not playing anything too complicated (Hungarian Waltz, FIRE, and Hikari)
Better get working..... "Fire, Fire, FIRE!" :D

π!

What's playing in my ear: "Blurry Eyes"-L'Arc~en~Ciel

Ah... The weekend: a chance to get some sleep, squeeze in some writing, and get together with friends.
YEAH RIGHT.
This weekend's going to stink, because my friend canceled on me, I have a load of homework, and I have to get up early.
SHOOT ME.
Well, it's nothing a little pie couldn't solve! π Day is the only thing I truly enjoy when it comes to mathematics. Come on people it's pie, what's not to like? (Which reminds me that I left some brownies in the oven...) Plus, π Day means that my birthday is only a month away! Sweet Sixteen!
In Business Law, we have been discussing identity theft, so Erik and I obviously commenced a discussion regarding who's identity we'd steal.
Erik: So, who'd you want to be?
Me: Chuck Norris.
Erik: I don't think you could get away with that. He pretty much runs the WHOLE FREAKING WORLD.
Me: Okay then, Mr T!
Heh heh
"I pity da foo'!"
I'd better go check on those brownies..... >_>
HAPPY ∏ DAY!

Crash and BURN

What's playing in my ear: "Te Busqué"-Nelly Furtado w/ Juanes

Wow...... I'm bad at keeping a blog, aren't I?
Geez, sophomore year is almost over, and my last post was from June. I need to stay on top of this blog thing. Not much has changed. I'm still your favorite anime-obsessed, soy-loving, slightly hyper writer. I've gotten at least 15 pages of my book written since my last post. I know that's not very much, but give me a break! I'M A BUSY WOMAN, PEOPLE!
I'm still not sure exactly what I want to do this summer. I was considering an NCSY program, but now I'm not so sure 'bout that. I wanted to do an AFS summer program, but my parents aren't so hot on the idea of me spending my summer in Hong Kong. (Come on, mum and dad!) Likely case scenario: I end up as a camp counselor again. "Why would you do that, you fool?" you may ask. Well...
1) I have almost no other productive pastimes for my summer
2) I have come to like kids a bit more than last year
3) I need the money.
Th'ar ye are. REASONS. But if them kids bite me again, I quit.
I'm serious.
But other than that, not much else is new. I did get accepted as a member of a fan-dub type project called SMU. So far, I don't have an actual role yet because they have a lot of female members, but I'm in no rush. These things take time.
Well, that's my life in a nutshell at the moment.

Drift Away

What's Playing in My Ear: "Makes Me Wonder"- Maroon 5

Long time no post, eh?
Overall, I have to say that freshman year was amazing. Much better than I expected at first. I made so many friends, and learned a lot about life and how long it takes to piss off Randy by poking at his bangs. :D
It feels like ages that I was a scared little eighth grader standing outside the school doors, my hair flowing in the September wind, not knowing what to expect once I entered inside, and yet, it seems like it was only yesterday at the same time. I've really grown from this experience and I feel like a changed person for the better. I'm a froshmore! XD
School's out for the summer as of 10:40, and I quote Loiben "...It feels pretty damn good." I'm not quite sure what I'm going to be doing. Probably drivers ed. and being a bit of a lump. >_> Maybe I'll be a camp counselor again and get rabies from all of the little kids that find it's funny to bite me! X_x
I want to get some more writing in now that I have all of this free time to spare. It doesn't necessarily have to be my novel, but maybe a few poems and stuff like that. It'd also be helpful to brush up on my cooking skills. The last time I cooked something, the fire department didn't even bother coming. I know everyone there on a first-name basis...
Enjoy your freedom! Love you all!
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX (multiply all those by 999,999,999,999,999)
~Mara

Zzzyx :D

Wow, it's been a while..... o.O
Life's been dandy, I guess. Still suffering from 3rd quarter depression, and man, did this week SUCK. My grades seemed to be slipping, a few of my friends denounced me as a "traitor", my social/love life was a messy time bomb waiting to explode, and in short: My life just seemed to be falling apart before my eyes. All I can say is: thank god for the weekend.
Most of my negative energy's been devoted to either piano or writing. Even if my English teacher says that my work is a load of crap, I'm still going to write. My novel's already at it's 43rd page of the second draft, and I'm not about to abandon it. I'm also working on a nocturne for my spring recital, I don't intend on walking up and looking like I can't play. I wouldn't call myself the next Beethoven, but I play pretty well. :D
In the past few months, I've found that I truly take joy in taking pictures and video of the people I love. I'm no filmmaker, but I find beauty in simple everyday moments of my life with friends. Who knows how much time I have left with them. I'm trying to take life as it comes, rolling with the punches. As Jack Dawson said in Titanic: "Life's one big poker game. You never know what hand you'll be dealt next."
~Mara

Nos Coeurs Sont Unis...

He makes my heart go aflutter
He causes my knees to go limp
He makes me lose control of what I say
He causes the hairs on the back of my neck to prick up in ecstasy
His scent stops me dead in my tracks, he smells of vanilla, spice, and pine
His step is light, but his presence is overwhelming
His legs are sleek and strong, but willing to dance with me
His body is slender, but strong enough to melt my heart
His chest is broad, but he allows me to fall asleep on it
His arms are powerful and mighty, but gentle enough to embrace me with
His hands are well-worked, but tender enough to pull back a wisp of my stray hair
His lips are soft when we kiss, yet strong when he speaks
His smile is warm and caring, but confident and brave as well
His eyes are like two glistening emeralds, but ablaze with passionate fire when gazing into mine
His hair is soft and smooth, yet wild and unpredictable
Whenever we touch, I feel a spark of joy shoot through my body
We are one
~Mara

生命は微風である (Life is a Breeze)

Good god, I haven't posted in a long time... Happy New Year? >_<>__> I love my friends...
I was just watching Titanic today, and I cried AGAIN. TTTTTTT_______TTTTTT It's just sooooo sad! I can't help it! Every time I see it, I hope that the ship won't sink, but it still does, and I always go "nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!" It's so depressing...
I still can't believe that four months have passed so quickly, time is just slipping through my hands like water. It feels like only yesterday that it was September 6, and I was scared senseless at the thought of entering a public school for the first time. Pretty soon, it'll be summer again, and I hope not to forgot everything I have learned. Being with my new friends in a new school, and being happy here, it just doesn't seem real. I've never felt this happy before, and I've never felt so alive. I don't remember the last time I ever had this much fun. Some roller coaster of life, eh? It feels like I'm in a gigantic dream. Well, this is one dream I hope that I never have to wake up from!
~Mara

Meep?

It's almost the end of December, and I have one thing to say: WHERE THE FUCK IS ALL THE SNOW!? It's like, bare here. It reminds me of winters in Denmark, and trust me, winter there is sucky. No snow in Wisconsin is like, messed up. Anyhoo, winter vacation reading is going okay, I'm already halfway done. Great Expectations is one of the most boring books I've read in ages. NEVER read it unless you are forced to at gunpoint.
A friend of mine says that she'll teach me Bulgarian. (Just to add to my randomness XD) And if you add that to my current language roster, you get:
English
Hebrew
Japanese
Spanish
Bulgarian
YAYZ! XD Sorry if I'm rambling a bit, I don't have much to say. ........GO DUCKS!.....
~Mara

Une Chose Originale... (One Original Thing)

As you can tell by the title, my latest language obsession is French. I've even changed my ipod settings to display everything in French.
I officially am a "Loozer with a capital 'C'" as my friend Melli would say. xD
My parents still won't let me buy a laptop with my Bat Mitzvah money, and I've run out of ideas. Eh, at least I have that babysitting job on Saturday night to get more cash for the "I need new shoes" fund. xD
I have a Facebook account now, so I can now keep in touch with old friends. I'm sure that some of them either:
Forgot me
Wanted to forget me
Remember me
XDDD
Winter break is fun, but I have to read 'Great Expectations.' Dickens is boring. Period. Meh, what more can I say? Life is life!
~Mara

Merri Kurismasu! *^_^*

Yes, it's that time again... Doesn't make much of a difference to me, considering the fact that I'm Jewish. We had Chinese takeout. >_>
But I have found a way to combat that dreaded 'D' from my math test. I got an 'A' on my last quiz, so if I pass another one, my grade will be brought up! I just gotta work hard!
I saw Pirates of the Caribbean for the first time. x_x Yes, I'm aware of how pathetic I am. I had never seen it, and didn't want to get into it merely because of the popularity. But now that the commotion has died down, and I've seen it, I found that it was quite a film to behold! I love Johnny Depp and Orlie, ~KYUU! XD
I was watching the Quill Awards (Like the Academy Awards, but for books) and Eldest won for 'Best Young Adult!' I was like "YEEEEAAAAHHAAAWWW!!" Paolini (the author/my inspiration) got up and gave his whole shpiel. Watching him talk onstage is really funny for me, because I got to meet him for an interview once, and he read to us in Dwarvish! xD
Naruto got 'Best Graphic Novel,' but seeing as I've never read it, I wasn't too thrilled.
Anyhoo, Happy Holidays, peace on earth and all that jazz. "Savvy?" XDD
~Mara

ほうき星 (Houkiboshi)

"My life is falling apart."
~Dennis, "Dennis The Menace"
I got a 'D' on that math test. Life sucks. T_T At least I can get the extra credit points. I got to see Eragon last Saturday, and I must say; OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!!!! ~KYAAAA!!! XDDD Lol. I'm such a rapid fangirl. Life goes on, I've gotta go study for the World Studies test.
~Mara
P.S Is 'Forthwith' a real word?

落日の約束/Yuuhi no Yakusoku (Promise of the Setting Sun)

Lumière-Light;By Me, Mara

“My heart, my dear heart. What has happened to my heart? I feel an empty hole where my heart once was. I feel a dark sad feeling whenever my soul yearns to find it. I cannot feel, I cannot sense, I cannot comprehend the darkness I feel within me. It seems like a hand of evil has crushed my spirits, destroyed my heart, and left me here. Alone, all alone. I stand alone, facing the day ahead. I weep for what was my heart, and yet, I feel brightness on my face. Someone is shining a light upon me, their light. Their warmth engulfs me, despite my being an empty shell. I feel a renewed hope, and I promise that when I see that setting sun, I shall go on. This warmth shall be my guardian light, as long as hope ignites.”
~Mara

Kimi He

Like the new layout? The old one was getting a bit drab. >.> I'm getting sick of the whole Al Bhed thing, so I'm ditching it. I really think this whole high school thing isn't as hard as everyone says it is. I'm actually going to my first dance. ^_^ Yes, I know, but still, dances=fun. I gotta go study for that bio quiz, but here's a little something.

Sonnets from the Portuguese 43: How Do I Love Thee

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight.
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace
I love thee to the level of everyday's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right
I love thee purely, as they turn from praise
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, --I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! -- and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

- Elizabeth Barrett Browning